I took a long (too long) break from blogging as well as any form of a healthier lifestyle and I have paid for it. I have gained 40 pounds since I stopped. My physical health is suffering. I had blood clots in my legs that went to my lungs over the summer, I am short of breath walking up a simple flight of stairs, I hurt everywhere, and I feel like crap every day. My mental health is suffering as well. I am depressed and anxious. I feel like a failure of a mother because I can’t do the things with Katie that I should be doing. I am uncomfortable in many social situations. I feel like everyone is staring at me because I am so fat. I have to force myself to leave the house some days.
Looks like I am at a point where I have to make a decision….Sit on my couch and die or get off the f’ing couch and do something about this.
I am at my highest weight ever! I don’t know what will make this time different from the other times I’ve tried to lose weight and get healthier. But at least I’m giving it a try and not settling for death on the couch.
Simple plan for now…My neighbor Erin and I will be taking Katie to the Y two days a week (three days eventually… maybe more) to work out and I am starting Weight Watchers Online again.